 Though naysayers have predicted that Facebook will eventually decrease in popularity and die out when networks of Facebook friends get too large and messages more impersonal, that day has yet to come. Are you on Facebook? And if you have older children who are on Facebook, are they friends with YOU?
Being on Facebook is like putting up your social life and daily schedule for everyone to see – literally your FACE to the world. Most parents whose kids are on Facebook would do well to follow this simple guideline that should apply to them as well as their children: no listing of private particulars or details, photos, videos or anything that you would not want to share with strangers or casual acquaintances. However, these aside – there is much that young people may NOT want to share with their parents in the interest of wanting their ‘private space’, and hence many would rather their parents NOT ‘befriend’ them. However, as a parent, wouldn’t you want to ensure the safety of your children, especially with cyber predators lurking around the Internet? This is a tricky dilemma, and what works for your family may not work for others. Check out these views to help you decide what’s best for you.
“My Mum is my friend, and on Facebook too!”
As mentioned above, being your kid’s Facebook friend may help you keep an eye on your teen’s general circle of friends and what he or she is doing during spare time, especially if your teen enjoys posting regular status updates. It can even alert you to a time management problem if you think your teen is spending too much time doing this. Generally speaking, if your children are barely in their teens and want to be or are already on Facebook, it is a better idea to do so only on condition that they befriend you. Many parents who keep tabs on their kids thru Facebook also say that it helps them get a sense of their children’s emotional well-being and state of mind – something that may not always be easy if they hardly see their kids due to clash of work and school hours. It can also help you understand your teen better in terms of trends, likes and dislikes.
My Mum wants to befriend me on Facebook – NO WAY!’
You have a good and open relationship with your teenager, and yet he or she would rather you not befriend them on Facebook – why? It happens to the ‘liberal’ of parents, and usually, because of the P word – Privacy. Not wanting their parents to befriend them doesn’t necessarily mean there are things online they would get in trouble for if you were to find out. For many, being able to keep one side of their lives private gives them a greater sense of independence and control over their lives. If your teens are managing their schoolwork and free time well, then you may want to allow them this privilege of trust in them, and they may respect you all the more for it. All the same, some grounds rules should apply – that they don’t display personal particulars, risque photos/videos or details (should they even be taking such photos in the first place – remember the Tammy incident??), and don’t arrange meetups with strangers they meet via Facebook.
Note that even if your teen would rather you not befriend them on Facebook, there is quite a bit you can still find out – you can see how many friends your kids have, what kinds of friends they are, and importantly, you can track what kinds of friends they add to their list over time, which which may give you more insight into your children.
What's your own stand on this issue? Are you Friends with your teens and older children on Facebook? Let us know 
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